


and on the fourth day, the sun sets

by isurani



Category: BanG Dream! (Anime), BanG Dream! Girl's Band Party! (Video Game), Subarashiki Kono Sekai | The World Ends With You
Genre: Gen, and kaoru's there if you squint., featuring hagumi's brother and her shit home life, is this hagukoko or am i just unable to write anything without making it gay: a memoir, mild spoilers for week 3 of twewy, really kanon's only mentioned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-13
Updated: 2019-03-13
Packaged: 2019-11-17 14:05:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,297
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18099998
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/isurani/pseuds/isurani
Summary: your joy (my joy)if we join them together, look! (we're strong and invincible)it’s something that anyone and everyone has.a power to save.





	and on the fourth day, the sun sets

**Author's Note:**

> slams the major character death button. this is gonna be fun.  
> this is a complimentary fic to a fic that hasnt come out yet! woah. uhhhh respect hagumi, be gay, play twewy, i might edit this later.  
> also we might get a second chapter if i feel like it.
> 
> minor? mild? spoilers for twewy week 3. the relationship is different since the characters are different though, so its only if you really look into it or. know twewy.

“Let’s start a band!”

The day Kokoro Tsurumaki said that, Hagumi felt the sun rise.

There was no reason to it, really. No purpose or meaning or planning. Kokoro wanted to do it, so she said it.

Dreams spilled out of her as easily as words, and Hagumi could only watch, starry-eyed at it all.

Anxieties welled up in Hagumi as easily as happiness did in Kokoro, however, and the next thing she knew, her mouth was rattling off about worries and materials and lack of experience and lack of members and -

A hand clamped down on Hagumi’s shoulder, and she couldn’t control the flinch that resulted. She averted her eyes, but Kokoro’s blinding smile was bright enough to sear through the darkness that clouded her mind.

“Don’t worry! It’s our new dream, right? Let’s follow it, Hagumi! To wherever it takes us!”

From anyone else, it would be childish. Childish, bland, empty words.

But Kokoro was sincere, and Hagumi felt the words take root in her own heart.

It was if her own imagination was working overtime, coming up with possibilities of dreams instead of failure.

“Kokoron,” she said, trying to control the feelings pounding inside of her stronger than her heart could ever beat. “Do you have a name?”

“Hm…” Kokoro put a finger to her chin in an amazing miming of thinking, since Hagumi could tell she hadn’t given it a single thought. She couldn’t help smiling.

“What about...Happy World?” The name slipped out of Hagumi before she could take it back, already shrugging her shoulders in defeat. It was too childish, too humorous, silly enough that no one would take it seriously. Hagumi prepared for Kokoro to laugh at her as she should.

“That’s an amazing name, Hagumi!”

A blink. She looked up at Kokoro, who was beaming like the sun. No, beaming  _ as _ the sun, stretching her arms wide with such exuberance Hagumi almost expected wings to follow suit.

“Hello, Happy World! Hello, our new band!”

Hello, Happy World. Hagumi took the smile that broke across her face cheek to cheek and quietly pocketed it away to think about later, before she could feel the tears of happiness or fear or anything drip down her face and dye the happy memory a different color.

 

* * *

Her brother was the only one who knew, once again. He probably knew more about Hagumi than Hagumi did herself, and she liked that just fine.

He took one look at her when she walked up to his apartment, on the other side of town, and grinned a soft, gentle smile that wrapped Hagumi up and made her feel safe.

“Don’t [Mom] and [Dad] want you home?” 

No matter how he tried to hide it, disappointment seeped from the names in a way that Hagumi wasn’t quite ready to deal with again. She barely liked her last name as it was. Thinking of them as “mom” and “dad” was almost easier to deal with than names that steeped them in personality, that made it so they were out there, that let her know that there were people like them everywhere.

No, there was only one “mom” and “dad”. That was all Hagumi needed.

She let the warmth of being lead inside by her brother give her the strength to answer.

“Probably, but Hagumi doesn’t wanna go home. She’s happy. She...wants to stay happy.”

A short laugh from her brother, but one with a strange, dark humor to it. 

“I get it, Gumi. If you wanna sleep here tonight, I won’t stop you.”

He never stopped Hagumi. But Hagumi never stayed.

Something hurt in her chest at the idea. The idea that a picture of her would line the underpass the same way as all the others, a mistaken flyer hanging there.

[Hagumi] Kitazawa. Missing.

Call [Mom] and [Dad] with any information.

It wouldn’t be being mistaken that would make her come home. It would be the words under it that would run with the rain until the paper soaked through, Hagumi’s own face dissolving under the pressure until she let her own face dissolve, running home.

And then she’d say nothing, again, letting the silence speak for her until she couldn’t listen to the nothingness anymore.

“Gumi. I’m right here. Do you want a hug?”

Welcome home, Hagumi.

She nodded yes, and let the smile wrap her up with two arms until she felt very much like Hagumi again.

Her brother never said welcome home. His smile said it all for him in a way Hagumi understood, but in words that made the silence welcoming instead of cold.

“Can we play guitar again?” she asked. 

And soon, they were picking at strings, and Hagumi was trying to remember what the sound of smiles was.

Her brother’s smile sounded deep and full and  _ content _ , like his laugh. Like his real, true laugh, the one she had heard when they played together as kids. The laugh he had with his old band, and with his friends, and with everyone who simply made him smile.

It was an easy laugh to get, but a hard one to refine. You could easily mistake a fake for reality, and once you did, the walls began to come up around his smile.

Hagumi hadn’t heard her brother’s real smile in years. She could only mimic it, plucking at chords until she could try and smile the same way.

That was what Kokoro had said. Making the world smile.

And if her world was her brother, it was an alright start. 

Hagumi was sure she’d feel the warmth of her own smile then, too.

A pluck at a string.

“Is this for your friend? Tsurumaki-san?”

“Mmm. Kokoron.”

“She really loves music, huh?”

“It’s more than that. Kokoron loves smiles. She just thinks...music can make them smile. Music will make everything okay. Hagumi...Hagumi thinks that too, cause onii-san thought that.”

Silence.

A sigh from her brother.

“Gumi, [Mom] and [Dad] aren’t gonna like this. Your grades are slipping enough as it is…I know you’re doing your best, but still.”

“Hagumi doesn’t care. She wants to make Kokoron happy.”

“And I know. I know she makes you happy. You’ve been happier with her than you’ve been with me for ages. But they won’t see it the same way.”

“Then Hagumi will stay here.”  
  
“No, you won’t.”

They played guitar together, but they never quite played music. It was never anything more than one pluck after another - Hagumi trying to find the right notes, and her brother trying to find the right thoughts.

“No, Hagumi won’t.”

They both tried to keep going.

 

* * *

[I want to change, I can’t change, what should I do?]

[If you don’t have any courage, I’ll give you mine.]

 

* * *

“Heeeeeeey! Everyone! Come join Happy World!”

Sometimes, Hagumi thought, she could swear that people in Shibuya didn’t really care about smiles.

For something that was so integral for them to be happy, they seemed to throw them away. As if the smiles were only needed for outward appearances, to make a mask of happiness and cheer when their hearts were in turmoil.

Hagumi held onto the smile she felt around Kokoro. She held it tighter and tighter, careful not to crack it.

If Kokoro was the sun, the smile was a drop of sunlight that made Hagumi warm and content and ready to bloom. Something so precious that it could only be looked at, never used.

“Happy World? What’s that?”  
  
“The Tsurumaki girl’s cooking something up again.”  
  
“She’s really weird, isn’t she?”

“Who’s that with her?”

“That girl from the softball team?”

“No, that’s the one that quit, right?”  
  
“I heard she got kicked off for being too violent.”

“I heard she got suspended!”

“I heard she got -”

The guitar Hagumi held felt foreign. It felt as heavy as the bat she was so used to holding, caked in dirt and tears and disappointment.

Caked in a dream that was never, ever gonna come true.

She couldn’t lift it. She couldn’t play it.

“C’mon, Hagumi! One, two, three - “

There weren’t any notes to play. Kokoro had never written them.

Still, Kokoro sang, without a care in the world.

People were murmuring about her too, of course. 

The Tsurumaki girl, born on a pillar with her head in the clouds, far above anyone else.

No, that wasn’t right.

Kokoro’s head was in the stars, looking down at everyone.

She could reach out and touch the stars. She could hold them to her heart, so that her whole body shone, so that her voice was sparkling and bright, blinding to anyone.

But what she wanted to do was share them with the world.

No matter what, Hagumi would look up to her. She would look up, but never right at her, or she’d be blinding by beauty and happiness and overwhelming  _ light _ .

All she wanted was to get a little closer. A little warmer. A little safer.

If it burned her up, Hagumi didn’t mind.

 

* * *

 

“I wonder why no one wanted to join?”

With her whole heart, Hagumi didn’t know.

“Fwaaaah~ Oh well! We’ll try again tomorrow, right, Hagumi?”

Hagumi nodded. 

She was holding hands with the sun. She felt like their mission was unstoppable.

“For now, let’s just talk to everyone we can, kay?”

Kokoro beamed at her. Hagumi beamed back.

She didn’t know who they were going to talk to in an underpass like this, but she guessed it was worth a shot -

The wind blew. 

And the wind ran past them.

Without a word, a blond ponytail passed by Hagumi as she turned, scraping up the papers on the ground.

A wary look from the face it belonged to, followed by a scowl beneath the mask she was hiding under. Hagumi dropped to the ground first, picking up the papers with all the care she could handle. They were volatile.

They were masses of blue hair.

Several smiling faces.

All of them missing.

Missing.

Kanon Matsubara.

Please contact Chisato Shirasagi with any information.

“Don’t look at them.”

Hagumi’s hands shook. The wind was shaking her.

She kept her mouth shut and her eyes dry.

“What’s all that?” 

“None of your business. If you haven’t seen her, then forget it.”

“But you’re not smiling! That means it’s totally our business!”

Silence.

Silence that dripped down the walls of the underpass until it stained every poster it touched, weeks and months and years without a reply.

“Tsurumaki-san, right? Let it go. Trust me.”

“But…”

“It doesn’t matter whether you  _ believe _ it’s your business or not. Either way, you can’t help. Let it go.”

Hagumi let the paper fall from her hands.

Her heart felt heavy.

“Do you wanna join our band? It’s gonna make everyone round the whole world smile!”  
  
Kokoro asked it so easily that it was almost a shock when the wind scoffed back.

“I’m busy.”

“But-”

“I’m BUSY!”

The wind blew again.

Kanon Matsubara flew down the underpass until she was gone from sight.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t yell.”

It was a cold wind, like in a winter storm.

“Hagumi wants to make the whole world smile,” she started. “She wants to make the world smile with Kokoron, so...no one will run away anymore. Hagumi wants to run away too sometimes...but everyone’s smiles are too important. So she stays, a-and she wants everyone to stay, too.”

It wasn’t a laugh that echoed back.

It was a sigh. A sigh that was weighed down by the crushing weight of it all. A sigh that was simply...tired.

“Changing the world, right?”

Hagumi nodded.

“One person can’t change the world through their efforts alone. At least, that’s what I thought…”

The wind outstretched her hand, and Hagumi took it, standing up until both of them faced the wall of posters. The wall that would only grow until it cut off Shibuya, until it choked them with their own regrets.

“I don’t really know anymore.”

But as Hagumi looked at her a bit closer, it was more as if the wind looked through them all. She sighed, and the pages rustled, and for a second there was a startling, bright star.

A moment of the night sky, hiding among the clouds.

Something that didn’t quite fit.

Missing.

Kao -

“Well, we’re not gonna be alone! Me and Hagumi are together, so you can join too!”

She looked up with a smile that hurt Hagumi more than a frown would have.

“I’ll think about it. If I find her...I’ll think about it.”

The three of them stared at the clouds.

Daydreaming.

 

* * *

 

[Warm love, lies and distraction]

[I'll learn that shouldn't matter]

 

* * *

 

She couldn’t sing.

She wanted to sing. So badly.

Kokoro was looking at her. Outside, the sun was shining.

“Before you start - “

A weak, sad noise came from her throat.

“You can’t do it -”

The guitar trailed off to nothingness.

“It’s such a waste -”

And then it hit the ground.

Kokoro looked up, blinking. A worried glance at Hagumi, one that for once had no words.

Hagumi didn’t have any words.

They were deafened. Her phone was ringing.

A tap of the button. A rise for the phone to meet her ear.

“Mom,” she began, mind full of excuses but tongue too weak to say a single one.

“Why aren’t you home?”

This was home.

Home was where the sun was.

“Hagumi’s with her friends,” she said instead.

“Doing what?”

“Playing.” Music was the unspoken word. 

“Have you been talking to your brother, [Hagumi]?”

She said nothing.

“I’m not losing another [daughter] to a dead-end career.”

“Hagumi knows.”

“Your grades are dropping again.”

“Hagumi knows.”  
  
“You know, but what are you going to do about it?”  
  
“Try harder.”  
  
“Trying isn’t enough, [Hagumi].”

“Hagumi knows.”

“Please stop giving me attitude.”

She wasn’t.

“You’re coming home, and we’re talking about this. Understand? We don’t have time for games like this if you’re going to throw everything we give you away.”

She felt sick.

“Do you understand, [Hagumi]?”

“Yeah.”

“Say it sincerely.”

“Hagumi understands.”

“Stop talking like that. Say ‘I understand.’ It’s manners.”

Kokoro looked at her.

“Just come home, [Hagumi.] Say bye to your friends. Whatever you’re doing, you’re going to throw it away like you did with softball.”

Hagumi took a breath, and -

“Hagumi? Are you okay…?   
Call ended.

Hagumi felt stars drip out of her eyes onto the guitar she had so carelessly dropped, and all she could do was watch.

A warm hand took Hagumi’s own and squeezed, tightly, until the warmth ran up and down and Hagumi felt a bit more like herself.

Tomorrow, she’d be scared.

Today, the sun wouldn’t set, and she would bathe in it for just a little longer.

 

* * *

 

If she ran fast enough, maybe she could outrun the rain.

If Hagumi ran a little harder, a little faster, maybe she could outrun everything.

Like softball had been. Just push it a bit more, run a bit harder, go a bit faster, and it doesn’t matter if you hit someone because you were running, going, moving, and it’s all just a blur.

She really still loved softball. She had never stopped liking softball.

She had stopped liking how she acted during softball.

Everyone was supposed to smile, but she wanted to prove herself. She had to prove it, to [Mom] and [Dad] and the whole, wide, world, that it wasn’t a waste.

Hagumi proved herself enough that they wanted her gone.

Happy World was about to be the same. Hagumi could feel it. She wanted to see the sun and the wind and the whole blue sky so bad that she didn’t want anything else.

She was gonna mess up everything she tried to care about. She was going to throw it away, ruinit, until the sun itself was disappointed.

Making the whole world smile seemed too hard if she couldn’t smile herself without feeling compelled to hide it.

Hagumi found herself under the clouds, the papers fluttering in the wind’s lack of presence. She was completely alone.

Staying over had been a mistake.

Waking up had been a mistake.

Everything had been such a mistake.

_ “We need to talk about the people you choose to keep company with.” _

_ “You need good influences.” _

_ “You should talk more with boys your age.” _

All she had sent back was the words that made the most sense to her.

“Kokoron is Kokoron. Hagumi is happy with Kokoron.”

_ “Stop acting childish. Grow up, [Hagumi].” _

“Hagumi is Hagumi, too.”

Silence.

Not even Hagumi’s own thoughts buzzed.

A photo.

Her bat, broken, splintered on the floor. 

If she brought her guitar back, she knew it would shatter much easier.

So she waited, hugging her knees to her chest, cushioning her chest in case her heart itself dropped to the floor and cracked right through.

“Heeeey! Hagumi! Where are you?”

For a second, the sun burst through the clouds.

Why was Kokoro coming for her?

She had said it. She had said that there was no way they could make the world smile.

Did Kokoro still believe there was?

Did Kokoro still believe in her?

“Before you start ~”

She wanted to try again. She wanted Hagumi to try singing again. Singing with K okoro’s light voice, the sound of smiles, of happiness, of warmth and sunlight. The voice that was carrying itself to Hagumi even alone.

Hagumi took a breath.

“D-don’t give up!”

It was if she could feel the warmth of Kokoro’s smile.

“You can’t do it ~”

Slowly, Hagumi stood on her own two feet, and faced towards the sun.

Kokoro was right there, the smallest smile on her face. 

Despite the roar of cars, Hagumi could hear every breath she took.

“Never thought of t-that!”

A laugh. The sound of shoes hitting against pavement, a call and response with every step closer to the curb Hagumi took.

“It’s such a waste -”

“- if you forget how to smile!”

 

All at once, a screech.

A screech of tires on road, a screech of a smile fading much too fast, a screech of sound being ripped from a throat.

Hagumi was moving before she even heard the scream bubble in her throat.

 

Home base was just a little too far away.

Nothing else mattered. Nothing else mattered.

She had to prove herself.

 

A crack.

A crack that just kept  _ ringing _ , cracking and shattering and causing the whole, wide world to fade to black.

Hagumi hugged the sun.

The sun hugged her back.

 

* * *

[That pain simply won’t matter!]

 

* * *

 

Her heart was pounding.

The world around her was loud. She could hear too much, and too little, all at once. Everyone was speaking too loudly,  _ thinking _ too loudly, enough that Hagumi just wanted to curl up and hide.

Why wasn’t anyone listening? Where was everyone going?

Why was the static around them growing louder and louder…?

_ Noise _ .

The word was there, in her head, as if it had been firmly pressed into her brain. 

_ Nothing to do except run _ .

But…

Kokoro. She was there.

Lying prone, gentle, like a small plush toy. The last thing Hagumi wanted to do was to disturb her.

Not with the sound of a car whining in her mind. Not with the last thing she had heard from Kokoro being a desperate, scared scream.

Hagumi gently picked up Kokoro, letting her rest against her chest.   
And she started running.

Between them, blue light began to glow. Soft and gentle at first, then bright, warm, like a sunbeam that shone only on the both of them.

A promise.

_ A Pact. _

Kokoro blinked, her eyes gently opening.

It felt as if Hagumi’s heart was finally beating again.

And then it stopped.

 

“Nice to meet you!”

 

The sun set once more, and all that replaced it was a dark, starless sky.


End file.
